Skip to main content

When kindness Sucks!!

I'm not going to talk about the pros/advantages of being kind. We all know what those are. I'm going to talk about the pitfalls of being the kind and generous soul that I am.
I'm the type of person who is generous and kind to a fault, well... to the people I choose. I always have this mantra in my head, "why not help if you can?" I never think twice when someone asks for my help, I go all in or half way if I can no matter what the situation.
I'm a giver. I give away things for no reason at all sometimes. I never expect anything in return because it's who I am.
They say, "Help a man once and he'll always come to you when in trouble." This has happened to me several times that the one time I failed to help someone, he looked at me with eyes suggesting I were the worst human being he has ever laid eyes on! That hurt but there was nothing I could do about it.
There are people I used to know who I let go of because they were taking advantage of my generous soul. They always expected me to bail them out of whatever situation they found themselves in which I couldn't take any more. It's not a crime to be kind because I don't do what I do to win brownie points, but don't let me find out that you're using me or are friends with me because you know you can get something out of me! That's not right at all!
I have been there for a few people in situations that as I look back on them, I realize that they will never be there for me if, I were the one who is going through what they went through. I have been or tried to be a good friend and a good sister. The more I grow, the more I realize that the people I've always been there for will never be there for me. And it hurts so damn much, I won't lie nor sugar coat it.
There are situations we go through that push our backs against the wall. Situations that make you have a few expectations from those you've helped to just once; step up to the plate and show you that they've got your back just as you have theirs.
I've had a few bad situations since the year begun that made me reflect on how I got to them and it's because of my generous and kind soul. These bad times made me realize that; much as I love to help or give, the people I give will never do the same for me. Some of them will never come up and do something good for me without asking questions as to why I deserve it because it's who they are. I'm not saying that I give expecting returns because I don't.
What hurts so damn much is the knowledge that whatever I go through, they'll never ever lift a finger to help, out of the goodness of their hearts. This is where being kind absolutely sucks because; as generous souls, we always have that little bit of expectation from others because we want to see a piece of ourselves in them. A piece of our kindness.
Don't you wish that sometimes, at least once in a lifetime, someone can step up to the plate and surprise you? Is it too much to ask especially with the knowledge that you've tried so much to be there for that person?


  1. this is a true reality piece i have experienced this all my life and it sucks. most of the time you keep telling your self that this is the last time am helping but its human nature as you said that you keep helping and hoping for the best to unvail.its an excellent piece.keep writing

  2. It hurts too damn much and sucks when the person you'd very much like to step up doesn't!
    Thank you ronnie :)


Post a Comment

Drop Me A Comment, If You Please...

Popular posts from this blog

The Power Of Association

One of my best friends sent me this quote and as I went through it; I reflected on the people I surround myself with both family and friends. There are friendships that I let go of during the course of the year and as I did that: I realized that the fewer friends you have, the better. It is said that,”The friends we keep define who we are as a person”…well, I didn’t want to be defined by such people because who they are is not the person that I am.
I am proud of the set of friends that I keep and maintain now because they are good people. They have been there for me in more ways than they could ever know. It is partly due to them I am who I am at the moment and I am happy about it and I appreciate them more. Here goes the quote….
"The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve. Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity. An important attribute in successful people is their impatience with negative thinking and negative acting…

I Love Technology.

I am a lover of technology despite the fact that it changes all the time. It is one thing that will never remain constant... Maybe that is why I love it? All the application, software creators put out something new, a few tweaks to their applications and software which is a good thing due to the multitude of competition out there. I always marvel at what comes out to help the user when it comes to software, applications and programs.Recently, I was reading a book using Adobe Reader. Whenever I would start the program to continue with the book, it would bring up a notification for an upgrade to Adobe Reader X which I would unfortunately ignore because; I tend to read when I don't have an internet connection.I decided to bookmark the link so as not to forget about the upgrade. I usually bookmark websites that I visit time to time and find interesting, links I need to check out for software upgrades and installations.After getting an internet subscription, downloading Adobe Reader X …

Obsession: The Fat Doctor.

Most of you know I am a certified TV addict who watches anything and everything.
Currently, I am obsessed with the TV show The Fat Doctor. It is about a certain Doctor at a hospital who gives hope and gastric bypass surgery (cut their stomach to the size of an egg) to the morbidly obese. I found out that now Britain has the largest number of morbidly obese patients and that the number of people who have had this surgery done rose from 600 a year to 100,000. Last time I knew, America had the largest number of morbidly obese citizens with Alabama being the fattest state in America.
It is typically not something I would watch but the stories told by the patients, the state of their health and appearance as they go about their day to day lives is touching. The surprising bit about the show are the different reasons as to why the patients are morbidly obese with each episode – Early puberty, loss, divorce, genetics, environment, depression etc. I find them all valid and beyond questionab…