Single For The Moment.

When we are in a relationship, we tend to let go of our values, what we really wanted out of it in the first place and we learn that everything is not about you. We lose our selves because we want to make the other person happy.

You never know how much of yourself is lost until you're out of the relationship and forced (sometimes) to be single for whatever period of time. You suddenly realize how hard and unbearable it is to be single when all you see are happy couples.

I'll be happy to tell you that Me, Myself and I have been in the longest relationship. The duration of this relationship has brought a lot of good things to the fore and I have managed to learn a few things.

I have managed to be there for my friends. Through the good, bad and ugly. I don't know why some girls let go of their friendships all because of a man. Friends other than family are the one thing that remains constant, especially good friends. They will always be there to see you through bad boyfriends, dates etc.

I learnt that if a guy really likes you and is interested in you, he'll do whatever it takes to have and be with you. I have a lot of friends who make excuses for the guys they happen to be interested in. we've all heard, 'he is busy,' 'works a lot,' excuses but truly, he just doesn't care as much as you do. Relationships are a two way street, you should receive just as much as what you've put in.

Being single gives you a chance to re-evaluate and honestly think about what it is you want out of your next relationship. Something that would be of mutual benefit and not just for one party's satisfaction. There is a time when you think you're on the same page with the person you're dating only for something to happen and make you realize that; not only aren't you on the same page, you're not even on the same chapter!

You re-gain your inner confidence. Most of us ladies go through stressful relationships in that by the time you're out of it, you're unsure of what to do next and feel inferior because the guy took away yourself confidence. Its through being single that you get a chance to regain your self confidence and build on it.

You get to find out who you truly are and what it is you want. Until you really know who you are and are honest to yourself, you'll never know what it is you want. And before you find yourself, you'll never be happy nor be able to make the other person happy.

So… go ahead and be single. Don't let yourself be the kind of guy or girl who goes from one relationship to the next. Give yourself time to discover who you really are and what you want out of a relationship before you embark on another one.

I Love Reading!

It feels so good to finally get back to what I love and am most passionate about in my life, that passion is reading. I am one of those avid readers, if I take long, I feel incomplete, and like something is lacking and I miss it.

Lately, I have been able to do just that; Read. I have read so many books that people get surprised when they find out but it is what I do. I had stopped reading for quite a few years due to a lack of access to novels. The guy I used to borrow from disappeared and also being done with school put a temporary stop to the passion.

 I am the type that hardly spends on a novel but given the chance, I will read it even if from someone else. I don't see the use of buying the book when I am going to be done reading it in a few hours and will probably lend it to a friend.

I used to go to my country's main bookstore, browse through the authors and titles or novels they had in stock.  If I came across a novel I was yet to read. I would take it off the shelf and make myself comfortable in the provided arm chairs, open the novel and read halfway through it. So as not to look suspicious and attract unwanted attention nor give myself away, I would stop midway through the novel, mentally mark the page I had stopped on then I'd leave only to return a few weeks later to finish the novel.

Surprisingly, I was able to carry off the act until one of the shop attendants found me one day, very caught up in the novel! Imagine my shock when she tapped me on the shoulder! She gave me such a fright that I couldn't even pretend or claim that I had been going through the summary! From then onwards, I wasn't allowed to sit in their arm chairs for more than five minutes and I also had to be visible whilst there so they could keep their watchful eyes on me. Due to that, my trips to the bookstore have been infrequent, why go when I can't indulge in my passion?

Where I work, our neighbor happens to sell her collection of novels and rents them out too since few people buy. That is how poor our reading culture is. I used to borrow from her until she refused to rent to me claiming I let my whole family and friends read her books thus returning them in frazzled conditions! I was too surprised because I am the only one that read her novels and aside from my mum, no one else reads in my family. Besides, my mum doesn't read as often as I do. I told her I will never rent from her again. She could as well eat her novels for all I cared!

One of my closest friends ended up giving me a few audio books and one in pdf format. I managed to read the one in pdf format within a few days despite having to read it from my laptop but I have to this moment failed to completely listen to the audio books. Funny thing is; one of the audio books is "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. There are so many rev reviews about the book which should motivate me more but…

Whenever I make the decision to dedicate a day to give it a complete listen, I end up getting irritated by having my earphones on for more than an hour and my mind would keep straying. I am more of a paperback person than an audio listener. It is so weird having a book read to you by someone else instead of you doing it by yourself, having it in your hands and letting your imagination run wild.

I must say, I have some pretty awesome friends. They always try to help me out when it comes to novels and books. One of them recently sent me pdf formats of a few relationship books by Steve Harvey (he is the author of the season) and not only that, he introduced me to online piracy! I should not be proud of that but I am. I have been able to download a few other books and the reader in me is very appreciative because I can satisfy my craving and passion for books. The fact I have to read from my laptop doesn't get me down, much as I am a paperback person, pdf isn't so bad.

Every time I finish a book, I always think of the person that sent it to me and I end up appreciating them more and more. 

xxxShanahxxx