Monday, April 20, 2015

I Am Important.

Once I lost trust in someone. 
Someone that I love.
I felt betrayed beyond reason.
My heart was shattered.
I realized that we all have emotions.
Emotions often control us.
We loose faith in ourselves.
Then realize what is important.
Me.
I am important.
The pain will subside.
The memory will fade.
I will be a stronger person.
I will be less vulnerable.
I have learned.
My trust can be restored.
Together we can heal.

Allow yourself all the time you need.

--Joseph Kitilson.

He was so kind in sharing this with me as a comment to my post on the Writers group. I thought it selfish of me to want to take the time necessary for me to get over a recent hurtful situation. This told me it is OK. To hold onto myself and my feelings and let go when I am ready because I matter.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

It Hurts Too Much Not To Forget

Why is it hard to get over hurtful words?
Words you never thought you would hear?
Acts you never thought you would see?

Why does the mind keep going over every little thing?
Eternally analysing intent and purpose?
Forever picking apart the situation like hungry vultures on a carcass?

Why can't we forget as easily as the way we change clothes?
Why do feelings of betrayal, anguish and impotence linger?
And make us walk around with the heavy burden of sorrow in our hearts?

It hurts too much not to forget,
And yet, too heavy a burden to carry around.

Friday, April 10, 2015

Volunteer Workshop

“You control your fate, you control your time and you control your life. Doing things changes things.” – Ross Simmonds
NUWODU Uganda recently held a small workshop for its volunteers and interns with the salient objective of boosting self confidence and esteem during the job hunting process and overcoming the challenges they face as girls with disabilities.
I found it not only educational but insightful. I love hearing about other people’s experiences. I may not necessarily like to share mine but I do love to hear what others have to say especially from girls with disabilities. This is the second time in my life where I have been given the opportunity to rub shoulders with people with disabilities. Before April 2014 and March 2015 I had never been in such environments.
Hearing from them and the challenges they faced as girls with disabilities during the job hunt was eye opening. What stood out to me most were the challenges: rigidity of thought pertaining opportunities and self marketing because they cut across both groups.
Rigidity of thought hit home because I have come into contact with several people who do not want to change their school of thought nor look at situations or opportunities differently. To them it has to be done the way it was meant to, for example, I have a Bsc. Information Technology and as such I should only look for jobs in Information Technology. If something you studied for fails to bring you that which you desire, why not find something else? Why not acquire a new skill set that will help you get where you would love to be? This is why people end up being bitter and frustrated yet opportunities are there, all you have to do is change your mindset and do self development if necessary.
Self marketing. As imparted to us in the workshop, we are now living in a generation where employment is not as clear-cut nor guaranteed as was previously done. It is about what you are offering, the skills you are bringing to the table and projects you are trying to pitch. Academic qualifications as a stand-alone are a thing of the past for the not so lucky ones. I came across an article by Ross Simmonds on Elite Daily where he said, ‘you are good as your last project. You are as good as your last pitch. You are as good as your last review. And with every day that passes that project, pitch or review will loses its wonder,’ and academic accomplishments mean nothing if you don’t create value – this can only be achieved through self development.
I personally believe in self development because I managed to land a job I never studied for academically. I spent a good year teaching myself secretarial studies specifically typing (I wanted to improve my speed on the computer which I did) and working for my mother helped me gain the interpersonal, communication and customer service skills which came in handy at my former place of employment. When the opportunity arises not necessarily out of lack of what to do, no. Out of interest. I take the time to catalogue that which I am doing here though not of late. I hate doing nothing! Sitting there and twiddling thumbs is not who I am. I have this belief that the things we teach ourselves stay with us much more than those we were taught.
The point is; do not be a stick in the mud where your thought process is concerned. Have an open mind because you are closing yourself off to so many opportunities yet you should be capitalizing on them. And do not be picky! Opportunity favours the prepared, prepare yourself, take the time to learn something new or teach yourself a new skill or subject you are very interested in. Your qualifications might not get you where you want to be but the skills you teach yourself will.
Ps: You can find Ross Simmonds article on elitedailydotcom under the title, ‘11 worthwhile pieces of advice for every ambitious young person.’ It made a good impression on me and re-enforced the thought to write about the workshop and follow nuwodu uganda on twitter @nuwoduadvocacy

Sunday, April 5, 2015

A Colourful Exploration.



I finally took the plunge and started experimenting with color in my drawings. You can not imagine how tedious the process was first time round. The time taken to settle on the colors to use; what to put it and the eternal question, ‘aren’t I messing it up?’ plagued my mind like no man’s business.
Drawing to me is a natural process, one that looks infinitely better in black and white in my mind. The idea of putting all that I draw in color was just a smidgen of thought at the back of my mind. A thought I never let fester at all because I draw for myself. Sharing on social media and some few friends has made me reconsider because not all of us see black and white and neither do we prefer the stark beauty of it when we can have it in color. With all that in mind; I decided to give it a go.
In all honesty; the exploration is not easy! It is easier for me to come up with a new design rather than dilly-dally over color choices and the indecision it brings. I hate indecisiveness in people and this makes it much more worse as I am forced to be. If I were a painter, it would be so easy. I personally think their mental concepts are completely in color before the final piece. By the time they translate it to paper, they know what colors would be best and know how to execute it all.
I have, so far, colored three of my many drawings and at the end of they day, I look at them with a dubious eye. This is how unsure I am. However unsure and doubtful I am over the process, I am giving it a chance. The chance to see what others see in color.

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Chains

mental chains
A few months ago, I joined a Facebook page for writing inspiration. As someone who loves interactive pages, I would read everyone’s pieces and be left in awe because they are really good. This is something coming from a person who doesn’t consider herself a lover of poetry. All the nuances of poetry are lost to me unfortunately; but it doesn’t mean I cannot appreciate the little I do understand. Being in this group has helped me flex the little muscle I have where poetry is concerned and I have shared several on the page which to my surprise have garnered not less than 20 likes. 
Anyway, one of the writers in the group shared this picture of a a little boy pulling back a wall ‘curtain’ to peak into a rainbow world he had yet to explore. The words came to me after taking a few looks at the picture and as I wrote it all up, I felt like I was talking about myself because I believe, as writers in the making; we write what we feel.

The Disability Lane

Simply Shanah harbors both professional and personal milestones. In 2019; I made the decision to separate the professional and individual ex...