My 2015

The year is a stone’s throwaway from coming to an end and I couldn’t be anymore glad to see it go. 2015 has been exceptionally hard in ways I never ever thought would be so much so that concentrating on the good in each day was a chore as the passed by.
Along the way; I made a lot of decisions that so far are turning out for the better. I hope they hold for times to come. Regardless of my mood and emotional chaos, there were a few smile inducing moments in my darkest of days even if I had to edit this compilation several times!

02/06/2015 – Gainful employment gives me a sense of fulfilment I am beginning to love. Alhamdulilah for the abundant opportunities.
06/06/2015 – Finding my bank statement with a heavy account balance made me happy
08/06/2015 – Finally got my letter of appointment to gainful employment!
09/06/2015 – Mentally planning a shopping trip is as taxing as the actual exercise.
10/06/2015 – Helped my male supervisors set up their skype accounts and seeing them make their first call was a sight to behold.
12/06/2015 – Shopping is as fun as being financially independent
14/06/2015 – Beautifully Fierce has 269 Likes
17/06/2015 – Three day trip to Nebbi was an incredible experience!
22/06/2015 – Picked up my iPhone
26/06/2015 – Every time I see him, I know without a doubt we would be married in another life
11/07/2015 – Lunch date with my girl Shar
14/07/2015 – That moment when you jokingly solicit a date from your crush and he accepts!
15/07/2015 – Conversations with Shree are always good catch up sessions
18/07/2015 – Paying it forward is one of the most rewarding feelings in life especially when you are in position to do so.
25/07/2015 – A surprise visit from aunt Djamilah is always welcome
27/07/2015 – The work website is finally up!
28/07/2015 – I love my job and the opportunities that come with it
8/08/2015 – When you realize some things are not meant to be and get rid off what connected and held you to them.
9/08/2015 – It is time for a cleansing of sorts. A beginning for fresh thoughts, new people and memories
15/08/2015 – Mayi’s introduction ceremony proved to be a fantastic day for catching up with the cousins.
16/08/2015 – I never turn away people who reach out to me unless in a bad mood.
21/08/2015 – Liking men in whatever way shouldn’t interfere with ones career goals.
23/08/2015 – Memories fade but they cannot fade as fast if we keep holding onto reminders of what used to be.
28/08/2015 – The ‘talk’ with my male Supervisor
30/08/2015 – When it comes to matters of the heart, only God knows.
31/08/2015 – Sad’s first anniversary.
05/09/2015 – A perfect lunch with my girl Shar and Indian cuisine as accompaniment. 
18/09/2015 – 5 am art grind! These are the moments I live for
19/09/2015 – Seeing Belle engaged brought tears to my eyes. She looked so gorgeous.
23/09/2015 – The past never has anything new to tell
25/09/2015 – I know where I want my life to go. I may not be there yet but I do know where it is heading.
30/09/2015 – Mariam Nan’s advice has never led me astray.
1/10/2015 – Created Shanah Off Duty for my art.
02/10/2015 – It feels great to have one of my best friends (Belle) back after her wedding!
12/10/2015 – Field trip to Kamuli. The source of the Nile is breathtaking to say the least.
16/10/2015 – Completed my first art piece for Shanah Off Duty in black and white.
18/10/2015 – Spending the day looking into the eyes of a beautiful little human. My baby’s baby is a pretty little thing
19/10/2015 – Shakira’s prayer for me touched my heart. Everyone needs a friend like this in their lives.
26/10/2015 – My savings are slowly coming together.
30/10/2015 – I need to make me happy for now. Forever.
31/10/2015 – Visit from my girl Emma.
- Another drawing added onto my collection.
04/11/2015 – Memorial prayers for the tenth anniversary of my grandfather’s death and five years of Simply Shanah.
05/11/2015 – The realization that I never want to be an after thought to someone God chooses for me.
15/11/2015 – You know you are done with someone when you tear the pages filled with their name out of your journal
- Baby Ihsaan’s birth. A little mini me for my brother!
19/11/2015 – There is nothing as fulfilling as giving back to children with disabilities
20/11/2015 – A day that went from bleak to promising in a moment
21/11/2015 – Last lunch of the year with bestie capped off with running into one of my favourite men
25/11/2015 – To know someone has a crush on you in one of your darkest moments is the best validation one can ever receive
08/12/2015 – Trip to Tororo. The urge to write is slowly returning to my thoughts
11/12/2015 – Alhamdulilah for the opportunities to work in unexpected but posh places and also do my work well
14/12/2015 – We live in a generation where you hardly know someone if you don’t know their favourite emoji

Social Butterfly

One of the things I neither expected nor anticipated this year was having a semi-active social life. Alas! I came out of hibernation and went with it.

Besides my work and art, it is the unexpected aspect that has brought me immense pleasure for it gave me the opportunity to meet a few good men. 

Over the weekend, I spent a few hours in the company of a man of a certain age. The kind that have the indefinable 'je ne sais quoi' about them but really it has to do with experience and how well they wear it. 

As I watched and listened to him talk; I kept thinking how we (girls) have the tendency to dwell and wallow in heartache and pain over past deeds, misdeeds and deeds undone that we invariably bolt doors- close ourselves off from socializing with good guys who come along during the healing period yet it shouldn't be so. We refuse to give these opportunities time and a chance out of self protection forgetting that the people we are suffering or suffered for never stopped practicing 'plate theory' and exploring all their options in our honor before and after the stopover in their lives.

Instead of bolting the door shut over Dick who was so full of himself he could self combust, keep it a jar at least to Harry, John or Jim who might come along and help you get over Dick.

Take the necessary time you need to heal but do not close the door entirely especially on someone you happen to make a connection with because at the end of the day, the decision to take a chance or not is yours - depending on how serious the other person is.

I think this is the reason as to why I have been on the receiving end of so many 'you have changed' remarks. It was inexplicable at the start but I'm beginning to get it. I'm glad something good came out of being a social butterfly because it took a lot of effort on my part. The best part of it all is having my social calendar come to close on such a good note. 

Alhamdulilah. 

IDPD Celebrations.

December 3rd is earmarked internationally for the celebration and commemoration of Persons with disabilities to promote action to raise awareness about disability issues and draw attention the the benefits of an inclusive and accessible society for all. Celebrations in Uganda were postponed to 9th December due to nomination of Members of Parliament.
I wasn’t into taking the trip to Tororo where the celebrations were to be held but as an employee of civil society organisation I had to suck it up and go. The trip itself wasn’t that bad neither was the company. Majority of the problems arose in Tororo and if it hadn’t been for the cheerful celebrations and seeing so many persons with disabilities in one setting, I would automatically call Tororo one of the worst places I had been to-date.
The theme for 2015 was “Inclusion matters: access and empowerment for people of all abilities” and most of the speeches from the guests of honour were along those lines. Disabled persons need to be included and should participate in all areas like transportation, employment and education as well as social and political participation. However, the opportunities are quite limited for persons with disabilities and if available, they have to work twice harder than their able-bodied counterparts to prove they are worth the risk. That is if they manage to beat the perception that persons with disabilities are lazy and only want handouts.
I have come to learn that laziness and the lack of ambition has no bearing on disability both mentally and physically. It is in fact cross cutting because I have met so many people especially girls who would rather rest on their laurels and wait for hand-outs from well-wishers. And also met three persons with disabilities who I take as mentors because they are highly educated, intelligent and running sought after organisations. They make me believe I am not who I am for nothing and also show me that ambition is inbred not something one cultivates over time. Regardless of disability or not, if one is not ambitious one will never want to work a day of his/her life.
When it comes to education of persons with disabilities; most of the schools available do not do justice to them. I had the opportunity to work closely with two girls from the same university and suffice it to say, the experience left me with a not so good opinion of Kyambogo University. These girls were timid, spoke in whispers and hardly expressed themselves eloquently in English not to mention the degrees pursued. Persons with disabilities really need to pursue competitive degrees not Counselling and Guidance alone. Who said that is all they are able to do? Physical weakness has no implication whatsoever on mental capabilities unless the person is mentally challenged. Universities should encourage them to pursue challenging qualifications that will enable them to compete favourably for well paying jobs like their able-bodied friends instead of being held back.

Anyway, we held an exhibition and had people buy a lot of merchandise we had on sale and I must say I am getting the hang of managing and running a stall. I should be since I have so far run three of them. And the best part of Tororo was being able to see the two men I cherish outside my immediate family – the one who finally got the – gainful-employment-ball rolling for me and his colleague who without a doubt I know I would be married to in another life. Let me not forget the workmate who put on a private dance show for me during the social evening. I think I need to get out more during the night because I am missing out on free barrels of laughter at the expense of drunk people’s actions.

MY 2015

The year is a stone’s throwaway from coming to an end and I couldn’t be anymore glad to see it go. 2015 has been exceptionally hard in ways I never ever thought would be so much so that concentrating on the good in each day was a chore as the passed by.
Along the way; I made a lot of decisions that so far are turning out for the better. I hope they hold for times to come. Regardless of my mood and emotional chaos, there were a few smile inducing moments in my darkest of days even if I had to edit this compilation several times!
01/01/2015 – New year, new beginnings
02/01/2015 – Jewellery design
07/01/2015 – Some people come into our lives to loosen up buttons we never thought of loosening in the first place.
- Sad is leaving soon
- Sometimes, it is better to be honest with a person and let the decision to stay remain in their hands.
08/01/2015 – Visit from  my girl Stella
12/01/2015 – Sad is counting days
14/01/2015 - Seeing the one to whom I am best niece and my little darling in her last stages of pregnancy
- Pre- birthday celebration for my Nyabo
16/01/2015 – Sad’s leaving for his homeland. I’m going to miss the big guy!
18/01/2015 – Knowing Sad might have his old job back is the best news ever
23/01/2015 – Sue’s graduation and I have never been so exhausted in my life!
24/01/2015 – Another drawing added onto my Heart series
26/01/2015 – Re-connecting with old friends
28/01/2015 – Catch up with Baby J and the boy talk was insightful
1/02/2015 – I love being in control but letting go has improved my disposition in this case
5/02/2015 – First poem from a boy!
- The reassurances from friends Shakira, Allen and Robert made me feel a whole lot better about work
06/02/2015 – My Nyabo saying I am a good writer
07/02/2015 – Treated myself to a fancy lunch after so many months!
08/02/2015 – Poem “we don’t always get what we wish for.”
10/02/2015 – When you least expect it; God brings you a ray of hope.
13/02/2015 - Surprise visit to my baby. So happy to see her in her last days of pregnancy.
14/02/2015 - “Tired” poem
18/02/2015 – To have someone whose written word leaves you in awe call you talented is an honour. I am humbled to know strangers find my writing good.
- A surprisingly good day. Alhamdulilah
21/02/2015 – Indecision is a decision. Let nobody tell you differently
22/02/2015 – I don’t know how Ntinda will work out but it was good to me the first time. Hopefully, it is where I am meant to be for now.
23/02/2015 - “Self preservation” poem
25/02/2015 – Got my letter of appointment for voluntary work
- Anila Naby’s birth
26/02/2015 - With change comes clarity. A clearer picture of who you want to become and the paths we must take to get there.
27/02/2015 – Catch up session with my girl Emma on the last day of gainful employment! I am looking forward to no work Saturdays
02/03/2015 - Some memories you just don’t need.
04/03/2015 – First day of voluntary work and I like it
- “The Moon” poem
06/03/2015 - Patience is a virtue for the virtuous.
11/03/2015 – The feedback on the poem “woke up to your birthday reminder” is heart-warming.
12/03/2015 – Fruitful day at work. Alhamdulilah
14/03/2015 – Added two new drawings to my Heart series and coloured one.
15/03/2015 - Art is an expression of my thoughts and life at that particular moment.
17/03/2015 – My Art portfolio consists of 20 pieces so far
18/03/2015 – Chat with my Supervisor gave me a little hope as regards the direction I want to take my career
- Some people don’t like being met at their level. so you take them to yours.
19/03/2015 – Another fruitful day at work! I’m glad for the chance to impart skills I usually take for granted
- Our thoughts are words waiting to be written.
20/03/2015 – Visit to see my baby’s baby
21/03/2015 – A reply tweet from The Single Woman
- “It doesn’t matter” poem
22/03/2015 – I pray God gives me the courage to pursue my dreams
23/03/2015 – Spent the day with my baby and her baby. I am proud of Baby J and her accomplishment. She is where I would like to be financially
25/03/2015 – The fact that people find me inspiring is an amusement in itself!
26/03/2015 – A new drawing. I can never tire of the creation process especially when a merger of two designs is involved. It leaves me awestruck
- Being asked to write for someone whose work leaves you breathless! Jon Storm!
27/03/2015 – Worked on my third coloured piece and love how it looks
28/03/2015 – Waking up to Jon’s feedback is indescribable!
- Colouring art pieces wouldn’t be possible without Ama’ help
30/03/2015 – Seeing Patience again and having the opportunity to work with her is a pleasure
31/03/2015 - Sometimes, the battle lines need to be drawn for you to know where you stand.
2/04/2015 – Sad never fails in his attempts to cheer me up
- Having a heart to heart with Clare made my heart a little lighter
05/04/2015 – The feeling of success is sweet!
- Five drawings coloured so far
09/04/2015 – Fruitful day at work! The mini-workshop was not only educational but insightful as well
12/04/2015 – Spent the weekend working on my choker necklace and the reality finally met my vision
14/04/2015 – First read into Manuscript Found in Accra
27/04/2015 – A chat with my ride or die girl is always what I need
03/05/2015 - “Imperfect hearts” poem
07/05/2015 – De Ja Vu moments due to work make me feel like I am walking in familiar footsteps
05/14/2015 – Trip to Gomba
- Creative firsts at work make me think I was meant to be in publishing
19/05/2015 – Fantastic feedback over my creative efforts especially the newsletter
22/05/2015 – Birthday!
25/05/2015 – Shakira always pops up when I need her most
26/05/2015 – Wonderful feedback about Simply Shanah
02/06/2015 – Gainful employment gives me a sense of fulfilment I am beginning to love. Alhamdulilah for the abundant opportunities.